Five Guys Burger Review – Stoney Creek, ON
Five Guys Burger Review – Stoney Creek, ON
Everybody in Niagara kept telling me to go to Five Guys, so I finally made the trip to the Stoney Creek location on Stone Church Road East. Some people even said it was better than oddbird. It wasn't. The Five Guys Gold Medal Burger scored a 5.2, which puts it at #127 out of 140 on my Gold Medal Burger rankings.
My order
A hamburger with lettuce, onion and pickle only. The price on my scoresheet was $5.03. Props to the staff for spelling Robyn's name right on the order (they asked how to spell it). The burger was ready when we got there, came in a greasy paper bag with the receipt and napkins, and was wrapped in tin foil. I liked the foil wrap, and it was steaming hot.
Double the patty
Unwrapping it revealed a sesame seed bun, chopped lettuce, horizontally sliced ruffle pickles, diced white onions and two patties. Five Guys isn't scared to stack them. Two patties, one bun, one bite, everybody knows the rules.
First bite
My first reaction: not bad, and it's a good burger. But the best burger in the world? Not today. As I kept eating, the problems stacked up. It wasn't juicy. It wasn't dry either, but it wasn't juicy. The diced white onions tasted like fast food onions to me, too pungent, and I'd rather see a red or Spanish onion. The pickles were fine.
Burger versus peanuts
Five Guys lets you grab as many free peanuts as you want, and inside you can toss the shells on the floor. I tried them outside, and I'm calling it: the peanuts are better than the burger. Salted, roasted, and good enough for an 8.7 out of 10.
The breakdown
- Bun: Sesame seed, standard.
- Patty: Double, hot, but under-seasoned and overcooked.
- Onions: Diced white onions, too pungent for me.
- Pickles: Fine.
- Peanuts: The highlight of the visit.
My verdict
Here's my theory: the people raving about Five Guys aren't ordering a Gold Medal Burger. They're loading up on fancy toppings that cover up what's really going on underneath. Strip it down to lettuce, onion and pickle and you get a hot double-patty burger that's under-seasoned, overcooked and topped with pungent onions. I wouldn't refuse to eat it, but I wouldn't drive to Stoney Creek for it. 5.2. The peanuts, maybe.
Find Five Guys
Stoney Creek, ON
